Room 101 - Sarah Dunys
Ever wished you could through something into the sea and never see it again! Well Sarah Dunys has taken the bull by the horns and put pen to paper to come up with her top 7 pet hates! We had to hold her down to get her to stop at 7!
I warn you that some of these are quite random, and may say more about my precariously balanced sanity than anything else…
1. Phone-ins
TV or radio, I hate them all – when I put Radio 1 on in my car I want to hear Chris Moyles being funny… I don’t want to hear ‘Joe Bloggs’ telling me about their day! If I wanted to talk to a normal person I could wind down my window and chat to the guy in the car next to me. And they say the stupidest things... “Can I just say hello to everyone who knows me” – NO – because they’re not all listening!
2. Personalised number plates
Now I’ve got to be careful here… D6 RTE… say no more! It’s not actually personalised as in what’s on the number plate – it’s more the changing the fonts on your number plate. Instead of YG02 YRT, it’s YG02 YRT. I mean… is that the only way the owner feels they can stand out in the world? The only way they can show their individuality??! Buy a new tie! Dye your hair! Go on Big Brother!
3. Comic Sans
Yes. The font. It’s not so much the font itself that bugs me… it’s the people who use it (sorry to you if you are part of that 98% of the population) I think that the dialogue in your head must go something like this “Hmm… Ariel’s pretty boring, I need to show that I’m not boring, what shall I use? Oh I KNOW… I’ll use COMIC SANS… it’ll show I’m cool and interesting for sure!” With websites like www.abstractfonts.com – there’s no excuse to EVER use Comic Sans.
4. The 2012 Olympic Logo
It’s meant to be targeted at young people, and it certainly looks like something that would be graffitied on my local corner shop. It’s garish and unreadable – and as for the £400,000 it cost … YOU WHAT??!!!! What did they spend £400,000 on?! And they are seriously wondering how they’re overspending on the London Olympics?!
5. Music When I’m on Hold
Ok, so I hate being on hold… but so does everyone so I’m not going to put that in my Room 101. But it’s the music they play… there is NO GOOD MUSIC to be on hold to. Why don’t they play jokes, or tell a story. “We’re sorry to keep you on hold, but incidentally why did the monkey fall out of a tree? Because it was dead” I think that would be GREAT!
6. All Car Drivers
Except myself. Obviously. I’m a great driver! I don’t really hate all drivers... but there are loads that do annoy me so I thought I’d whack them all in here. The BMW-driver who sits in the fast lane because he ‘could’ overtake everyone on the road if he really wanted to. Or the clapped out old banger that crawls along in the middle lane because it’s driver is too stubborn to accept the reality of his car situation. Then there’s the bus driver who pulls out in front of you even though you’re half way round overtaking him… and the new driver who’s just passed her test but decides to put a green ‘P’ sticker on their car because they don’t ACTUALLY feel confident enough to be on the roads without one… here’s an idea DON’T DRIVE!! And I even have a problem with the people who have a ‘Baby On Board’ sticker in their back window... it’s not gonna make me ‘not’ crash in to you... I don’t PLAN on crashing into anyone! (and if there IS any scientific proof that those stickers make cars safer to be in then to be honest I think that the government should hand them out free!!)
7. The Little Plastic Tags That New Socks Are Held Together With
I think new socks should come in singles. Yeah, you’ve got two feet but you’ve got two eyes too – and you can get those lazered individually. And my socks never wear out at the same time… I think I must walk funny on my right foot. Those little plastic tags are so annoying! And to be honest, I think they insult my intelligence… I can pick up a pair of shoes and buy them and get them home without losing one – why can’t I do the same with socks?!
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